Brianna Goldberg Says Things Occasionally

In which I defend Taylor Swift

Sun, 16 Jun 2013 09:02:12 -0400

DEFENDING TAYLOR SWIFT IN A TIME OF NXNE is all about loving the earnest feelings fountain Tay-Tay in the midst of my city’s largest indie music festival.

I also talk about what pop music was like in the Jurassic era, include video messages from Salt-n-Pepa and generally try to change your mind about the lady so many people love to hate.

The Great LOLCatsby

Mon, 06 May 2013 15:39:00 -0400

Check out something new I’m trying out… a mashup of cats and The Great Gatsby and internet memes:

THE GREAT LOLCATSBY!

Photo

Wed, 01 May 2013 22:09:19 -0400

This is a noise that happens in my apartment. It is not coming...

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 22:21:00 -0400

This is a noise that happens in my apartment. It is not coming from my neighbours above or to the side, and I have no neighbours below me— just the laundry room/mysterious storage areas of my apartment building.

This noise happens at random times and random days. Sometimes I won’t hear it for several days in a row. Sometimes, like the past two days, I hear it almost every hour of the night.

It doesn’t happen in the daytime, only at night. It happens most often at 3am and 4am, but also sometimes at 9, 10, or 11pm.

Sometimes when I hear it, I run through the apartment building, trying to find where it’s coming from. There is never anyone around in the areas where the noise seems to be coming from. There are never any monsters around (that I can see).

For the love of all things mysterious sounding: Do you know what this sound is? And can you tell me how to make it GO THE FRANK AWAY?

Actual things I've said today while listening to streaming radio of Canadian singer-songwriters

Mon, 25 Mar 2013 14:26:30 -0400

Go away, Barenaked Ladies.

Go away, Bruce Cockburn.

Go away, Gordon Lightfoot.

Go away, Blue Rodeo.

Photo

Mon, 25 Mar 2013 14:08:45 -0400

Too many hobbies and too little feee time can cause instrumental...

Sat, 16 Mar 2013 16:10:38 -0400

Too many hobbies and too little feee time can cause instrumental anxiety.

rookiemag: All in Your Head Not everything is about you.

Thu, 07 Mar 2013 15:40:00 -0500

rookiemag:

All in Your Head

Not everything is about you.

Photo

Thu, 07 Mar 2013 15:37:43 -0500

explore-blog: Kurt Vonnegut’s classic lecture on the shapes of...

Tue, 05 Mar 2013 11:51:29 -0500

explore-blog:

Kurt Vonnegut’s classic lecture on the shapes of stories, now in an infographic.

In Defense of the Happy Girl

Thu, 28 Feb 2013 14:18:06 -0500

newyorker:

Sasha Weiss considers why people find Anne Hathaway, Hollywood’s “happy girl,” to be so annoying: “Little girls learn very quickly to modulate their excitement if they want to be acceptable… Anne has somehow managed to retain that bright look, and many people would like to wipe it off her face.”

Continue reading: http://nyr.kr/XFpWAi

Photograph by Jason Merritt/Getty.

Happy Tuesday!

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 10:41:34 -0500

Happy Tuesday!

Yet another Facebook “suggested” page that make me...

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 15:31:00 -0500

Yet another Facebook “suggested” page that make me want to simultaneously barf and punch Facebook.

Thoughtful Taco #3

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 23:32:53 -0500

Thoughtful Taco #3

vanityfair: Caviar, anyone? See what Oscar-shaped dishes the...

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 23:31:59 -0500

vanityfair:

Caviar, anyone? See what Oscar-shaped dishes the Academy is serving this year.

Photo by Brandon Clark.

Ew. Right?

Thoughtful Taco #2

Fri, 22 Feb 2013 16:30:17 -0500

Thoughtful Taco #2

FACEBOOK I CAN’T EVEN DESCRIBE HOW ANGRY I AM AT YOU RIGHT...

Fri, 22 Feb 2013 13:45:00 -0500

FACEBOOK I CAN’T EVEN DESCRIBE HOW ANGRY I AM AT YOU RIGHT NOW.

I popped in for a quick check on the latest update from my book club and then there was this “suggested post.” (Which I then wrote over in red in the attached image, to express my displeasure.)

FB, you often try to “suggest” pages to me, and I always, always, always ask you to put them away and never show them to me again.

I know you have all sorts of crazy algorithms telling you everything about me and who I like to creep and which photos of people I barely know that I linger over for too long… so why don’t you get that I hate everything you try to suggest to me? Here’s something you could suggest that I might like: CHEESE. Or TAYLOR SWIFT. Or POODLES. It’s not like I’m hard to please.

And aside from the suggested pages, you also try to get me to click on ads for sites selling engagement rings and wedding photography even though, if you read between the lines of my FB activity or spoke to me for one blinute (one billionth of a minute), you’d know I have very complicated feelings about the whole business of marriage.

And so, y’know, I feel like you’re a bit of a dum-dum when it comes to trying to sell me things. But since you’ve been a dum-dum about it, I haven’t been too angry. You just don’t know any better. You’re too duhhhh.

But now THIS? THIS?! You’re trying to make me hate my body/objectify this stranger/encourage other women to hate their bodies by “liking” a page that you deign to suggest is “inspiring”?

That girl was friggin’ gorgeous at 139 lbs. She looks malnourished and frail in the supposed “after” shot. Not to mention the fact that her eyes now appear dead and cold like the bleak winter in which your evil suggested page extends its gnarly claws.

This post made me feel physically ill and physically angry.

I am furious you put this in my consciousness.

Can’t a girl just check in on the status of her book club without being told to hate herself anymore? Seriously. No humour here. Just. Really. Asking.

Thoughtful Taco #1

Wed, 20 Feb 2013 20:38:13 -0500

Thoughtful Taco #1

Photo

Tue, 19 Feb 2013 17:26:11 -0500

slaughterhouse90210: “There is nothing like puking with...

Thu, 14 Feb 2013 07:36:13 -0500

slaughterhouse90210:

“There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends.”
— Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar